The Sultans of Schlep, LLC ®

November & December 2014
Offer for Customers moving wholly within Philadelphia:
40 free boxes (your choice of small, medium, large) with your move.
Delivered free in advance of your moving day!

“Your Movers Were AWESOME!”

Courteous, Competent, Affordable & Friendly.


Seasoned crews of any number from 1 to 8 workers.


Professional Carton Packing and pre- & post-move Household Organizing available.


Free use of WARDROBE BOXES for your move.


Insured. References available upon request.


(215) 821-8051

“The guys were fantastic! The crew was miles above my expectations. Would use again and whole-heartedly recommend to friends.”
—T.M.

“All went very well! Everything moved beautifully, no problems. Thanks again for your help.”
—C.J.

“We had a great move last weekend thanks to the team you sent! They were all very helpful, courteous and speedy!”
—J.B.

“The move went very well. I thought your movers were very helpful and well prepared. Thanks again.”
—R.F

“I just wanted to say that your movers were awesome. Really efficient and quick. Absolutely no damages! Thanks again!”
—S.K.

“The move went very well! Everyone was really pleased with the work your people did. Thank you for your help.”
—Marie M.

“The move was the best I've ever had. The guys showed up slightly early and we're really helpful and professional. Keep up the good work. Honestly,having movers who showed up on time was enough to make the experience for me.That seems to be really uncommon, from my experience. I'll be sure to recommend you to my friends.”
—Mike H.

“I just wanted to thank you for the absolutely easiest and stress-free move I have ever experienced. The guys you sent out did a great and quick job, and were very polite and helpful to me.”
—G.N.

“Thanks again for making my move a success - they were right on time, no damage & no problems at all ;). The team took very good care of everything in spite of the rain we were battling all day. Tell them I appreciate having guys who know what they're doing & that I don't have to worry about. I had to run over to the new place to work w/ the DirecTV installer at the same time your team was loading the truck. I came back & they were cruisin' right along...”
—D.K.

“Thank you for your help in another great move. I felt very lucky to have found you a second time, and the guys did a great job. They worked quickly and got the move done in 2 hours. You have a good team with these guys.”
—B.H.

(215) 821-8051

Beautiful Room
Ethan Haymes

This room is beautiful. Just a desk and a piano. The piano, the one you got when you were eight years old in Fort Worth, Texas, looks like is was finished on the factory floor yesterday and that it has never played a single note. Unwrapped for the first time in this pristine home. Outside, there is so much everything, and so much nothing that the silence is deafening.
The desk has been used well. It has seen many years of thinking, writing, and calling while telephones were still associated with the furniture they were placed on and not free to float around in midair and travel hundreds of miles from their nests. The desk sends its energy out in straight lines. Cosmic Rays. It sends microscopic decisions, plans, and deadlines that jet directly to their intended targets while passing through walls, flesh, and earth without leaving a mark. It is the core of the cheesy looking star atop the sign for the Astro Motel or the Cosmic Inn. There is function here, joy here, there is pleasure and even delight, but not "beauty," not its own beauty? No sex?
The piano's energy pulses out in rings, sound wave shaped disturbances of the perfect environment. These shapes take on their full color when it is played. This complex instrument responds to human touch and gives something back. You can use a piano to kiss someone. Before karaoke, one had to be able to harness the sounds of one of these vessels As well as produce sound waves through the instrument of the body to attract mates (). In short, you can kiss someone with the sounds of the piano. A kiss is still a kiss. You cannot kiss someone with a desk. You can sit at the desk and he or she may kiss you, but you were loved and desired by this person before you sat down. At the piano, if you are skilled, you can seduce the most austere sensible being into rapture. Music is what can lift our crude perceptions high enough to feel the breath of god.
These energies, the circular lascivious ripples of one and the unashamedly direct lines of the other, both are the strongest in the direction of the user whether he is at his post or not. This is the one thing these two have in common. The way that they are positioned, both facing generally toward, but not right at, the very center of the circular design expertly woven into the rectangular carpet,  makes them harmonious. If both of these powerful beings were made to stare directly at the center of that circle, equidistant at 90 degrees, the center would be a physically uncomfortable place to stand, and would summon you to stand at it all the same. It would dare you to tempt the power of its existence, and see if you could escape with a sound mind. This would turn this pleasant den into a torture chamber.
Piano. Rug. Desk. We have now arranged them perfectly and it was worth the extra time and thought. You narrowly avoided a very unpleasant thing by trusting me to help you set this room up.